Make Your Inner Game Shine

Yes, you read it right, just make your inner game shine if you want to attract woman. And probably it is the most important aspect of success, with women, in life, in the workplace, is that of "inner game", or your own personal emotions and beliefs. We can call it inner game, because in the game of life, this has to deal with your inner most self. It's the one thing you have the most control over, and it's the one thing that influences all those around you.

Inner game can be a very difficult beast to be handled, because it has to do with how you see the world around you. If you look at talking to a woman as an opportunity to be rejected, that's how you're body will react. If you look at is as something fun to do, you'll also react accordingly.

This is where things like approach anxiety comes from.

If you want to get over approach anxiety, if you want to get confidence, just do it. Go out by yourself. Go out to a club all the way uptown or downtown. People aren't going to see you again. Just crash and burn a few times. It happens all the time. You want to just put yourself out there, get shot down. Get blown out. It's funny. Go with a wingman. Play a game. See who can get blown out the most. See who can approach the most girls. By the end of it you guys will have the funniest stories.

It's bad for about two seconds afterward, but you laugh about it, and with your wingman. It's funny and no one says anything. It's not a big deal. I think it's a real confidence builder. Just going out there, getting shot down, realizing what it's like. It's not that bad. More often than not, you go with that mindset (have fun) and your interactions with women will open up.

Just by getting that initial contact within minutes you will feel so great about yourself. You went out. You did it. You got your foot in the door. Half of this stuff is just getting your foot in the door. Once you get your foot in the door, it's not that hard.

Ask yourself: How are you going to be different? That's how you have to be to get your foot in the door.

This kind of thing can be painful at first, but with experience it passes. Try to visualize positive outcomes to your endeavors, and if things go badly, shrug it off as a "learning experience" and don't make the same mistake twice.

In school, you don't get every math problem right, and you don't pass every test. That's be you're learning. You're accruing knowledge to be used later on. When you first started learning math, an equation like 5+6 was difficult. But the older you got and the more math you did, and equation like that eventually became easy.

With women, the learning process is still there. Guys who are good with women learned what works very early on. Guys who have trouble with women are still on that learning curve. The only difference between women and math is that we put more importance on the outcome of approaching a girl than we do on getting an equation right.

Take a good hard look at yourself. Look at what is holding you back. Look at the negative beliefs you have that keep you from getting what you want, and then challenge those beliefs. You will slip back into them from time to time. This is normal. The important things to keep in mind is to not let them dominate you.

After a bad night, it's easy to fall back on beliefs like "no women like me," "I'm not good looking enough," "I'll die alone," etc. But the thing you must remember is that everyone goes through these kind of self-defeating ideas in their lives. Even the guys who are good with women.

The difference comes down to the notion of whether or not you're going to give up the pursuit of what you want because of those beliefs, or if you're going to power through the tough times and actually get what you want.

The thing that separates winners from losers is sheer determination. Ever hear that old saying "slow and steady wins the race?" That saying is very true indeed. It means that people who keep moving forward, no matter how slow, no matter what obstacles, will eventually get what they want. If you allow yourself to burn out or quit just because the going gets rough, you'll never achieve what you want.